1. The Predators are (maybe) in trouble, or are perhaps pulling an imitation of the Blackhawks, and have screwed up their QOs. (Qualifying offers, for those of you who don’t do acronyms.) Apparently, the Predators have some difficulty discerning the difference between how a fax machine and FedEx work. Suppose we’ll let them slide, it is only 1981 in Tennessee, afterall. Please, nobody tell them about email for a while.

2. Wisniewski. Yeah, he totally played for one of those Canadian teams a certain person around here (ahem) seems particularly fond of. Spelling his name is today’s daunting task. Spelling test will be administered shortly after the conclusion of his contract signing, so read up on Porty and Reed retweeting each other today. Seriously though, he seems familiar with this “power play” thing that has become exinct in Columbus, so ultimately Scott Howson should do whatever it takes to make good with this guy, even if it means a year’s supply of Buckeyes co-eds. Wait, wrong acquisition. Whatever, sign him, bro.

3. Ciao, Commodore: He’s been placed on waivers (again), this time the buy-out kind (cue scary Halloween ominous music). So long, Commie. It’s been real, and it’s been fun, but it hasn’t been real fun. We should’ve known this would end badly when we saw those dollar bills haphazardly strewn across his jungle of wiry burnt orange hairs.

By now, everybody is well aware that Jeff Carter is now a Columbus Blue Jacket and Jakub Voracek is not. (That was weird to type.) According to the Dispatch and the all-things-negative department, Carter has yet to speak, either publicly or to Scott Howson. For reasons unknown, this has caused Jackets fans to go insane with fret. Does it mean he won’t be a Jacket and won’t show up? Absolutely not. It is June 27th. The Stanley Cup was just awarded two weeks ago. The draft just happened. It’s not even Free Agent season yet. In simpler terms: it is the offseason, and Jeff Carter owes nothing to Columbus yet. He was traded after making a personal commitment to a team – wouldn’t you need time to simmer if you told your boss you were in for the long haul, only to be cut loose shortly after? Why are we pressuring him to talk while upset, when he may something he doesn’t mean and will some day regret? This is a never ending self-fulfilling prophecy of negativity.

Let’s not burn bridges in June. Let’s not Black List him three months before he has to don the union blue.

Don’t take this personally, guys. If he’s still absentee come September, then worry. Put the manic-depressive Kool-Aid down.